hello. :D i'm jasmine tan and i'm proud to be a child of God :D

i want a canon digital IXUS 970 IS, an ipod classic, a new handphone and :D

layout: detonatedlove♥
images: foto_decadent
patterns: plagues buyolympia
brushes: devilinthedetails

angel
angel/rachel
anna
charlene
cheryl
daniella
eeyang
ella/hannah
germaine
gurvin
huishann
hweeyin
jacq
julianne
levinia
lorraine
mavis
muhaina
parveen
raihan
rebeccacheang
sipei
weishan
xinyi
yeeting
zachary
zhaoming

6h'04
1a'05
2a'06
4z'08
youths

in the end i didn't publish that post. if people were to think i'm sad or whatever. that would be a bad thing. so i decided to post a reflective but NON emo-ish post. and just don't ask if i'm okay after you read this, cos i am. just need to let off some steam.

yeah.

and finally after 10 minutes of comtemplation, i decided.

nope. you're just going to get a sheepish smile from me.

and there.

HEH :)

( 12:37 AM )

it's just the start. the beginning may have reached an end, but there's a long way ahead to the grand finale.

and there's one whole long stretch of road ahead of us. we've experienced this bump together. and we'll keep on going. without a turn off or an exit. i'll keep on walking with youu. no matter what. good or bad.

hahaha. and today i went cycling and blading. :) i finally refreshed my memory of blading. yeah, with the manual 'how to blade 101'. lol. i'm being rubbish today. and yeah. i was nice. next i shall learn how to blade without getting a backache. haha. so if anyone wants to go blade, come find me okay. :D

lol. i'm writing letters again.

and today was also the walk4bibles. and we saw them at east coast. walking and walking and walking. :) wished i could have been there, but we needed serious family time. cos our schedules are like really hectic and no time for togetherness. lol. but it's really cool to see people taking time to walk. for Christ. oh and another piece of ver good good news. his brother accepted Christ. :) like wheeee. celebratee.

and then since i'm on a writing spree. i might as well blog a long long post today. the other day i walking past the coro bookshop and saw 'plain truth', 'keeping faith' and another super nice book. and i was like O.O and only fairly cheap. so i'm like very tempted. and pray that i can save enough moneyy. i've like nothing more to read already. read all my books a hundred times or more. wheee. so can't wait. and OH. if anyone has like a super interesting book. lend me please? :D

hahaha. today is like my i don't know 'extortion' day? as in i've asked for time and books already. what more. hahahaha.

and i was looking at becky's blog. and saw this. i was super free. so heck, why not. and this is what I came up with. some are a little off cos this IS a PUBLIC blog. so :) i'm just going to keep the real one. hm. in some other place. haha.



tada. i think it's like super cool. (: don't youu

oh well. another of her posts just shook me up. i'll be taking the express chinese 'O' levels like in approximately FOUR months time. like erm. about 120 days, 2880 hours, 172800 minutes, 10368000 seconds. i would do a countdown. BUT i'd rather not scare myself. AND the oral exam? it's after the holidays. so yup. now i'm officially scared.

oh well. next i think i'll do a reflective post. about. life.

( 11:27 PM )

hello. let's be crazy today. was going to say emo, but it just didn't fit. and then later i'll rant. wheee. go ahead, click the white cross in the white box at the top right hand corner of your screen noww. and oh well, for those of you who are nice enough to stay and read my rantings. thank you. but it's quite rubbish.

it's been a crappy crappy day. bad bad bad bad. and lousy. sorry my vocab is horrible, so i have a limited choise of words to use. you'll find a lot of repetitions here. and it was the last day of school. and i got like 28/30 for a STUPID TA. like wth. why can't it be the real thing. so. UH. and then my head started throbbing from last period. and i had to go through hours of games. and then some other stuff WITH THE IRRITATING HEADACHEE. :( i was like crying after i showered. cos it really hurt so bad. and. ah. so i took out the tub of chocolate ice cream and finished it up. i'm probably 10kg heavier now. but now the head's not so bad. but the chocolate hasn't done anything for my mood and aches and my red red eyes. oh well.

today they announced the head prefect nominees. jia ling, yee ting and grace. wheee. all the best.

oh well. my neck is ACHINGGG. and i'm hungry. ah, i think i just get started on my holiday homework.

huh, you must be glad to be rid of me. so bye.

( 4:14 AM )

hello. (: i loved this afternoon. lol. and so i'm happy. hahaha. wheeee.

there's going to be a netball, volleyball and badminton carnival in cedar on the 4th of june! lol and i'm in charge of administration. wheee.

lets paint a rainbow and a sun above you. then there'll be sunshine forever, a reminder that i'll always be with youu. and a rainbow that God promised never again to flood the whole earth.

i'm tired. WHY YOUR CLASS END SO LATE! :/

oh well. hurhh. lol.

byee.

( 5:59 AM )

it was previously named in other words, but it was changed to it's first line. but i like the name in other words. it reminds me of speaking in riddles, metaphors. like not speaking directly, yet implying something so meaningful. (: i love songs like those. and it's really nice. hahaha. go listen, it's really very very very nice. in other words, ..

the song queen of my heart is nice too. (: dancing like there's no tomorrow.

oh. i've finished my biology holiday homework. easy, easy, easy. (: just changing whats on the website. lol. and then tomorrows a slack dayy! (: yay.

wheee. i'm happy today. (: and i twisted my ankle while walking. AGAIN. like for the hundredth time this year. utter brillance.

tomorrow is A division national netball finals. hwa chong against raffles. wheee. hm. wonder who'll win. (: lol.

goodnight. take care people, and GOD BLESS.

<3

( 5:50 AM )

hello hello. (: happy happy happy today. (: hahahaha.

cos. no particular reason. and to yeeting and ella. i DID NOT go see my mom. she's in NEW YORK for goodness sake.

hahaha. and then i finished my biology worksheets. (: and then i didn't have maths today. wheee. and i can't wait for wednesday. school ends early, only four periods of lessons - all slack periods, TOP is some language and cultural presentation, and rest. (:

and now, photos from last friday. (:


cedar WHOOSHH.

love them lots. <3s

hahaha. wheee. tired tired, GOODNIGHT. (:

( 6:37 AM )

hello. (: lol. i'm doing biology now. haha. cos i've to hand it up by tomorrow. :/

friday i went for the vj guitar ensemble concert. lol. it was nice. and i liked the singing too. :) and then joy was there. and i bought a sunflower for her to give her friend. and then i felt so bad. :/ lol. so then i brought another one on saturday, which was cedar's 50th anniversary dinner. wheee. in school. :) oh and i was having band practise. and then i saw my teachers walking out of the lift from the carpark. i almost got a heart attack can. lol. and then i realised they parked in the church and walked to school. lol. :) and then today i played in yf. and i made alot of mistakes. but oh well. haha. i'm somehow craving yong tao fu right now.

hahaha. and i'm reading nineteen minutes. it's so nice and sweet okay. :) it's my favourite, right after my sister's keeper. :) but it's sad. 'in fairytales, when the mask came off, the handsome prince still loved the girl, no matter what - and that alone would turn her into a princess.' the book's really really really sweet.

oh well. byee. back to biology. :/

( 5:40 AM )

hello. :) today's friday. like finally. :) and then there's the vj guitar concert tonight. hahaha. i found out joy's going too. lol. okay. recess is going to end already. :) see you soon. CLAIRE! i'll call you very very soon tell you the 411 alright. hahaha. BYE. i'm highh. :D

( 7:38 PM )

don't mind that last post. i was crazy. but i'm still waiting

( 6:29 AM )

i had my history test today, and i totally flunked it. :/ wheee. how fun. and lets say ouch again cos it hurts everytime i read it. and everytime, knowing that it'll hurt, i go read it again. huh. don't ask me why am i so stupid. or who am i talking about. go jump to your own conclusions. like i care.

i'm mad. at someone, everyone. and anyone. huh. so i don't know why i'm blogging right now. i'll only get angrier. and more pissed. and sadder. and moodier. and crankier. and yeah, you get the idea.

haha. i decided to add laughter to this post so it looks somewhat livelier. haha. and not so emo. which i am so not. just pissed. lol. hahaha. and adding laughter to make it not look so moody. lol. nonsense i know, aren't i always.

and once again. i always wait for the message that will never come. and the call. to my house, for goodness sake.

( 3:13 AM )

hello. it's been a long long week. and now we're back to wednesday again. and i've a SEQ test tomorrow on stalin. and i'm going to fail. :) i just studied the whole afternoon and i can't remember a thing about his dictatorship. just a blur of the five-year plans, collectivisation, the purges, yezhovshchina, the cult of personailty, the stalin constitution. :) and i can't remember the details. brilliant eh. oh and i havent like practised any SEQ. so therefore, i'm officially dead. :D wheee. i can't wait for friday. like the weekend. :) and also a vj guitar ensemble concert. hahaha. and then on friday there's photo taking for cedar netball team. :) and oh 3z took our class photo on erm. oh yeah, yesterday. and i looked totally spastic. :) whee, as always. my phone's stagnant. someone's supposed to message me but didn't. :) haha, joking. uh. i think i'm just like. over stressed. whee. and the best part is that after so much USEFUL studying, i am going to fail. how nice. ah. i'm tired. and i totally blacked out during history today. not while she was teaching, she didn't come so we had a free period so instead of studying, i use the precious time to sleep. i really know how to use my time. when i'm stressed i am very sarcastic. haha. and i think i'm going to end up confusing hitler and stalin. :/ oh well. wheeee. okay got to go study some more. :) bye

( 5:57 AM )

hello. this week i'm super super happy. haha, especially today. like totally :) haha. firstly we had pe, nothing to look forward to, but at least nothing really bad to dread (like NAPFA, by the way i got gold with 27 points) and then was history. :) i really love history. and hitler and stalin and blah however evil they may be. to top it all off ms lizah somehow through just explaining the slides makes it interesting. :) and then when i went back to class i saw this letter and pocky. like :D and then it was a two full page letter from my angel as promised a longer letter and a nice reply after myes. yay. THANK YOU. and then i spent my recess replying her. cos i want to jian fei. very fat. :( so i'm not going to eat recess unless there is training. though yesterday i didn't eat recess and lunch and nothing till dinner time. lol. and then after recess it was pretty much slacking. english was spent drafting SOMEONES letter. cos my handwriting was horrible at that point in time and i didnt want to waste a thousand pieces of paper. chinese was the presentation time. omg. i am going to fail. i spoke so bad. and so little and i think my group mates are going to give me very low, cos i spent one full group session sleeping. :/ lol, not that they did much work but STILL. and then ss lecture. we learnt so many good good SEQ skills. cedar style. and secret tips not to be disclosed to people from other schools. :) hahaha. my paper was so messy. and so full. all my columns were full of notes. :) felt so accomplished after that, cos i understood everything and also managed to finish a letter to da jie. after that i was violated by nair. and then stayed back to play badminton with anooja, hwee yin, raihan, mumu, xinyi, nair, charis and keatli. then smiled :D like don't know what cos of something someone told me. :)) and studied after a while of playing. and then we played old maid. hahah two rounds, the second round was down to nair and hwee yin and they went round and round and round until parveen finally took the old maid. then i came home. yesterday was super tired. and slept at 9.30 and still couldn't wake up at 6 this morning.. :/ wheeeee, another three hour prayer session this saturday. :) and then masterlife potluck at night. :) byeee.

( 2:05 AM )

OUCHH. that hurts.

but thats something i have to live with i guess. cos you're the one with the past, not me.

( 7:00 AM )

i'm fighting for something real ,

you know i hear stories of percecutions worldwide. and of christians dying for God. and i wonder how did i ever get off so easily. and i wonder. where's my courage. where's my faith.

dear jesus, please give me the courage. to reach out and touch the lives of people around. to step out of my comfort zone and into the relm of the unknown, because you are there. help me. to live for you. not to be held down by the evil one, but be able to stand up under any kind of hardship because you are right beside me, helping me through. help me to keep faith and to keep believing. and at no matter what the cost. love jasmine. amen.

( 5:44 AM )

i was looking through a cupboard full of old books that used to be my parents. they packed it all away into this cupboard under the computer table. and its so cool. :) all the books. hahaha. and interesting topics. :D

haha. and my goal is to get nice nice abs. wheee. hard ones, like SOMEONE i know. and not fats. :/ oh well. i'm going to work hard. :) and then wheeee. do lots of sit-ups, crunches, etc.

today was the chemistry and geography mid year exam for the sec 4s. during their break between the papers they were sitting everywhere, revising like there's no tomorrow. it's kinda freaky. in about a years time, we'll be doing the same thing. mugging so hard, getting stressed out, getting the lower sec irritated for taking up their canteen tables during their recesses, pigging out, getting fat, NOT TRAINING. i realised that 4 years really passed so fast. like in an instant we're upper sec and just next year we'll be the most senior in the school. but really. somehow, i really don't want to move on. even though i've only spent two years in cedar. its really THE PLACE where i want to be. maybe through all the changes and everything. but somehow, there's this sense of attachment that you will develop. :) now i think about it. i'll really really cherish these memories i have. :D every single one.

i was watching step up, a time for dancing, and honey. and then. i marvel at how wonderful dancing is and can be. and at one point in time sometimes i wish i had just worked harder at it, continued to dance. but don't get me wrong i love netball. just that you can't compare, one's a sport and one's everything. if only..

whee. channing tatum is hot. :D

( 4:52 AM )